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How being bold and moving out of your comfort zone enlarges your life.

by | Apr 27, 2015 | Tips for dating | 0 comments

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For most people, joining an introduction agency, at least one as personal as Heavenly Partners , is a big step – one that they don’t take lightly –  and one that probably  takes a bit of courage.  But really joining is just the easy bit. Once you’ve joined you’ve then got to start contacting (and responding) to other members and for some people (probably most of us if we’re honest) this is the really scary bit – and something we are not used to doing. For most of us, contacting people who seem like complete strangers – on the basis of asking them if they’d like to become friends and possibly with the hope it might develop into something more – is right out of our comfort zone.  And if something is outside our comfort zone, we’d generally rather not do it – because, as its name suggests, it’s not a comfortable place to be!

Being outside our comfort zone is not a comfortable place to be

So if this resonates with you, read on.

First, being outside your comfort zone is actually a really good place to be because it’s often the only way we grow and develop. And, secondly, because your comfort zone is no longer a fixed ‘space’ once you’ve  moved out of it, the boundary changes and, before you know it, what was once outside your comfort zone, is suddenly (often imperceptively) now within it.

Let me give you an example. Sarah, our new member of staff, started her work here processing all our new members’ profiles. She was completely out of her comfort zone and very uncomfortable. She didn’t like the feeling of not knowing what she was doing, being unsure whether she was doing it right, and wondering whether it would ever all make sense. In fact she didn’t like it so much that she almost resigned. That’s how uncomfortable she was.

But – and here’s the important thing – she stuck at it, and lo and behold two weeks later (yes it was that short a time period) she found that doing those profiles was a piece of cake, something she found almost second nature (and now enjoyable!) and surprise, surprise no longer outside her comfort zone.

She has grown and something she found hard – and outside her comfort zone – is now plum in the middle of her comfort zone.

The boundaries of our comfort zones are not fixed spaces

The same is true with almost everything in life and it’s the same for all of us!

Perhaps you’re feeling outside your comfort zone contacting new people. Trust me, the more you do it, the easier it will become – and if you do it regularly you will find it as natural as walking (which, once upon a time, you couldn’t do!).

So, gird your loins, determine to be bold and step outside your comfort zone and get contacting others. Recognise your feelings for what they are (you could call them growth pains if you like) and know for certain that if you persevere and don’t quit (as Sarah could have done), the whole process will get easier and easier, and before you know it, you won’t feel so uncomfortable about it.

And, of course, contacting others is the way to meet people… and that’s why people join us… so please don’t let a short term lack of comfort stop you in your tracks.

If after reading this, you’re still feeling unsure and nervous about moving out of your comfort zone, take a moment to reflect on Abraham’s call by the Lord (Genesis Chapter 12) to move out of his country and go to a new land. This was definitely not in Abram’s comfort zone – but he trusted the Lord, moved in faith and of course the rest is history.